Earth to Ms. Hill! EARTH to Ms. Hill!

August 9, 2007

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If Tiger Woods, Slick Rick, Michael Jackson, Afrika Bambaata & Angela Davis had a fivesome (*shudders*) the above would be result yall… ‘Jacket, pants, pearls, rouge! WIPE HER DOWN!’ What kinda fuckery is this Ms. Hill!?!? Are the stylists not being paid enough? Or are you just too crazy to wear clothes like the rest of us mere peons? Methinks her ass got dressed in Osama’s cave. With that said, I think all hope for a Fugees reunion and the mere thought of another classic album are shot to hell. I’m so over her antics and psuedo-‘deepness’..I shall mourn now (not really)

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!!LikOmG!!LOLz Britney shaves her crazy head bald.

February 17, 2007

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Let’s keep this short and sweet like Emmanuel Lewis shall we:

  1. She walks into some ‘who cares’ salon and demands to have her head shaven.
  2. Lady refuses so Brit does it herself a la Bernadine in Waiting to Exhale
  3. She gets even crazier and gets numerous tatooes.
  4. Paparazzi has multiple orgasms.
  5. Hilarity ensues.
  6. Brit checks into Cedards-Sinai Medical Center in L.A
  7. A few hrs later, she decides she’d rather not get sober and checks out.
  8. The world comes to a screeching halt.

Wow. Either this bitch is a genuis at publicity or this is really sad. Especially since kids are involved. K-Fed is somewhere in Motel 6 laughing his ass off.


Foxy Brown is a crazy ho

February 17, 2007

foxymugshot.jpg MIAMI (Reuters) – Rapper Foxy Brown was arrested in Florida and held overnight for battery and obstruction of justice, according to the arrest record and local newspaper reports on Friday.Brown, whose real name is Inga Marchand, was detained at a Pembroke Pines beauty-supply shop on Thursday night after a disturbance there, The Miami Herald newspaper said.The arrest record of the Broward Sheriff’s Office said she was held on $1,500 bail for the two offenses. It gave no further details.The hip-hop artist was sentenced in New York last October to three years probation and anger management classes for assaulting two nail-salon stylists over a $20 manicure.Brown was ordered to stay away from the manicurists for the next five years.

TMZ says she threw hair glue at an employee (lmao!) and spat on another. The cops had to subdue her with the “takedown method” (bwahaha)  Damn, this bitch is like the Deebo of nail salons. First off, It’s only 13 dollah fo’ refill and 25 fo’ foo set.  Second, somebody needs to tell her ass about a lacefront wig. Her ass probably still glues to the scalp. Third, why can’t she just sit her ass in a chair, breath in the toxic fumes and talk about shit no one cares about like the rest of us? Is she that hard up for cash? I don’t even feel sorry for her gremlin lookin ass. I’m curious, can she even hear? Who cares. I’m sure her ass can read. If you see Inga, tell her TAKEITOUTSIDE said Hoe Sit Doooown!!!

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Mike Tyson’s style is IMPREGNABLE!!!

October 17, 2006

STRONGSVILLE, Ohio – Mike Tyson says he may include bouts with women on his next tour, and mentioned professional boxer Ann Wolfe, who is 21-1 with 15 knockouts.

“She’s such a prominent, dominant woman in the boxing field,” Tyson said. When asked if he was joking about fighting women, Tyson said, “I’m very serious.”

Russ Young, a promoter for Wolfe, said such a bout will never happen.

“That’s the first we’ve heard of it,” Young said. “No state would sanction that. She would be outweighed by 60 to 70 pounds. Ann would never entertain the idea.”

The 40-year-old former heavyweight champ launches “Mike Tyson’s World Tour” on Friday in Youngstown, Ohio.

Tyson said the tour was meant to be fun and raise money for charity.

“It’s all fun. I’m not Mike Tyson,” he said, referring to the fierce boxer whose career was upended by a prison term. “I’m not 20 years old. I’m not going to smash anybody. I’m not going to talk about smashing anybody’s brains. You’re not going to see that guy no more.”

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAaaa..is all I really have to say about that. Really, i’m speechless..Mike Tyson just made my week. His impregnable style will impregnate these woman. Genius! Robin Givens is somewhere having a fuggin nervous breakdown or something. Welp..If that didn’t make you piss your pants with glee here’s something that will.

Mike Tyson Inteviews


I’ll eat you celebrities!